Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Living above the clouds

God is so good.  Amen, right?  Through the stress of job hunting and interviews God has been working in amazing ways.  I was given the opportunity to fly down to Florida to spend two weeks with my best friend and her family.  I'm humbled by the Lord's provision and the Benner's open door, welcoming me for such a long time.  I loved being able to reconnect with my beloved sister and get to know her kids, one of which was born while I was in Uganda this past year.  Her husband and I have the same personality and sense of humor which also makes for a good time.  All in all, I'm blessed.

Living in Florida has it's perks... namely, the beach.  We were able to go 3 times to 3 different beaches.  We were also able to go to Disney's Animal Kingdom (for free, PTL) which was a blessing because I've never gone to that park and also because the Africa section made my heart leap for joy.  It may sound a bit silly, but just walking down the road and through the "village" (modeled after Mombasa, Kenya) and seeing everything written in Swahili brought tears to my eyes.  I loved being able to read and understand so much of the language... I also loved how authentic Disney tried to make it.  The safari we went on was of course a bit cheesy and the animals don't just roam free, but it felt so good to be in (fake) Africa.  I wandered in and out of the shops and saw some of the same type of items I bought buy in the markets in Kampala, although obviously I got a better price over there.  It was odd to get so emotional considering I was at a Disney theme park, but with half of my heart still residing across the world I guess it's understandable.

Even though I long to be in Africa, I'm learning to be content with where I'm at right now.  I've mentioned many times the fact that I'm sick of not having a job, car, or money.  It's more complaining than mentioning, to be honest with you.  I've realized that through my complaining I'm not honoring the ways that the Lord is indeed providing.  I have not gone a day without food, clothing, or shelter thanks to my friends and family... all of whom I've seen Christ in whether they recognize Him or not.  People have made and continue to make selfless sacrifices in providing for me.  While it may be embarrassing for me at times, it's how the Church is supposed to work.  We're supposed to be holding each other up and encouraging one another.  Praise God for family and friends who have done that.

The other day when I was flying home from Florida I had my iPod on and I was listening to some beautiful worship music and trying to process everything God had taught me during my time there.  We took off into dark, cloudy skies and the first 10 minutes of the flight were pretty shaky.  However, when we broke through the clouds and the sun pierced the plane, all was quiet and calm.  A thick blanket of clouds covered the ground below, but the sky above was bright and warm.  It was beautiful. Now, I've flown on plenty airplanes to plenty different states and countries.  I've flown in great conditions and I've flown in terrible conditions, causing the flight to be rerouted before the wind entirely took control of the plane.  I've always loved flying above the clouds, but it wasn't until this past flight that I thought about the fact that every single day has the potential to be sunny.  There has never been a day in my life time when the sun has ceased shining.  Even when clouds make it impossible to see the sun and feel it's warmth, it's there doing it's job as always.

This isn't shocking, new information to anyone... at least I hope it's not.  But it got me thinking about my role in furthering the Kingdom.  Being a Christian and fulfilling the Great Commission doesn't include sulking because of what I don't have.  It's a lifestyle.  So if I'm truly working to further the Kingdom, than this no money, no car, no job thing doesn't matter.  I have everything I need to work for God because I have Christ.  My prayer for myself and for the Church is that we would ignore what we don't have or what we do have (and what we think we need) and just work.  Just keep moving forward and spreading the Gospel no matter where we're at or what we do.  If you've got a full time job, good for you.  Are you still working to further the Kingdom?  If your life is full of different programs and you're insanely busy, are you still taking the time to preach the Gospel?  Are you still walking with Christ in spite of what you do and don't have?  If you're not working for the Kingdom, what are you working for?

God's Kingdom will be furthered whether I'm involved or not... just like the sun will shine with or without the clouds.  I want to live above the clouds, I want to be doing Kingdom work.

Sunday, April 15, 2012

God of THIS City

For the past few weeks I've heard the song, "God of This City" each time I've left church on Sunday morning.  There was a time within the last 4 years as this song reached it's popularity that I didn't care for it.  Not because it doesn't have good lyrics, but because for one thing I didn't fully grasp the power of the lyrics and for another thing it was way overplayed.  Radio has a tendency to do that to most songs for me.

However, it's had me thinking for weeks now.  To claim an entire city in the name of God is quite ambitious, don't you think?  We claim our kids as we baptize them.  We claim our marriages, our lives, our homes, and our church buildings in the name of God.  But do we have the guts to claim a whole city in His name?  Claiming all of these things is nothing to take lightly.  Satan is threatened when we do this.

Today there was a baptism at church.  A baby boy was baptized and the Church claimed that it would nurture him and bring him up in the ways of the Lord for the next 18+ years of his life.  As a visitor of this church I sat and wondered if the congregation realized the commitment it was making.  And how many times have I spoken the words on the screen at my own church, agreeing to participate in seeing that a child is brought up in Christ, and never paid attention to that kid again?

So what about a city?  How much dedication and hard work does it take?  A lot!  But it can be done.  I really believe that it's time to stand up as the Church and proclaim our cities for the Lord.  There is so much boldness to it!  If we look at the beginning of Paul's ministry in Acts we see over and over again how he boldly spoke for the Lord, how he boldly preached Kingdom truths in many places.  Who was Paul?  Look at where he came from, his education and his faith growing up.  He was working in direct opposition of the Kingdom for a while, but was turned around and knocked upside down by the Truth... as a result he went.  He fulfilled the Great Commission with boldness.  He saw cities come to know Jesus in powerful, very real ways.  How encouraging!  If Paul was able to do that, so can we.  There's no magic behind Paul's ministry.  He came to know the Lord and began to preach.  He didn't attend tons of seminars or years of seminary.  Kooky, right?

Although we don't know for certain who the author of the book of Hebrews is, it's widely believed that Paul penned the book.  Chapter 4, verse 16 says, "So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God.  There we will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it most."  God doesn't call us to be bold without backup.

So all that said, I believe we have the power, with the Holy Spirit to radically change the cities we live in.  God is ruler of all and will be acknowledged as so by everyone someday.  It'd be nice if as His bride, we the Church would stake His claim over all the earth.  Mountains will move, lives will be changed, His Kingdom will reign on earth.  For me, it begins with prayer... being very intentional about praying for the cities of Plano and Oswego.  That's where 95% of my time is spent and I want to see those cities won for Jesus.  It's that way where ever we live.  When I lived in Kampala I prayed for Kampala.  To clarify, I've not stopped praying for that city, but I know there are people there focused on furthering the Kingdom, so for now my focus is more towards where I'm actually living and worshipping.  I can't speak enough about the power of prayer.  Miracles happen when people pray.  God is glorified when His people pray.  All glory to God.

You're the God of this city
You're the King of these people
You're the Lord of this nation
You are

You're the Light in this darkness
You're the Hope in the hopeless
You're the Peace to the restless
You are

There is no one like our God
There is no one like our God

Greater things have yet to come
And greater things are still to be done in this city

Greater things have yet to come
And greater things are still to be done in this city

Amen.

Saturday, April 7, 2012

Easter Eggs

I love these girls!  Kayla, 7, Alexandria, 4

Sunday, April 1, 2012

Humble Pie

I'm going to make this brief (I hope).  I met with an admissions counselor from Wheaton on Friday.  All went well and the program would be amazing.  Wheaton is somehow prestigious and viewed highly by most.  A masters from there would be fantastic.  I meet the requirements, I did well enough on the GRE, and I'm pretty sure I would have some great recommendations and essays.  The biggest problems for me right now are pride and money.

As I sat there on Friday and got super excited about the future and hearing how the clinical psychology program works, I started to feel proud.  However I realized on my drive home that attending Wheaton, being good enough to be one of the 20 students admitted per year, and hanging up a degree with that name on it was what I was focusing on.  Yes, the education I would receive from Wheaton would be superior in a lot of ways, but if my main concern is what other people think, that's a problem.  

The reality is that 10-20 years down the road when I'm practicing... whether here or abroad, I don't believe my success will have anything to do with the name of the institution on my degree.  I can learn the same material and fine tune the skills needed at any number of schools.  I was a bit ashamed of how proud I had become about attending such a highly acknowledged school.  

My undergrad cost me nearly $100k... which I am still paying for today.  It seems financially irresponsible to add another at least $40k on top of the debt I already have just because of pride.  So I'm going to grab a slice of humble pie and look into other options.  Not to mention that I still have about 4-6 prerequisites to take seeing as though my undergrad wasn't psych.  I'm hoping to get those pre-reqs done asap so I can start a masters program.  The latest I want to start the program is Fall 2013.  It'll be a 2-3 year commitment. 

Even that short time stresses me out because there are other things I'd rather be doing, but I do believe that the Lord has called me back to be a student for the time being.  I've looked into and found numerous ways to get back to Uganda asap to be in full time ministry there and a few of them are fairly easy.  It's no secret that being here in the States is a struggle for me and I'm anxious to get "home", but I will abide.  AND maybe once I'm established in a program I'll be able to do some online courses and spend a semester or summer back in Africa.  It's heartbreaking to think that the next time I'll be on African soil is when I've completed my masters, but we'll see.  

In the mean time, I'm still job hunting and will probably take a retail job until a ministry position opens up.  More humble pie.  God is good.  "Remain in Me."