Yeah, I know. It's been over a month. I've had some demand for a new blog post for a while, but writing (one of my favorite things to do) has not been high on my priority list lately. At this point I feel like I have so much to write about that I don't even know where to begin. So an update will have to suffice for now...
August flew by into September in such a way that most of it is almost dream-like to me. Fall programming has started which means my schedule has kicked it into high-gear, as they say. August ended with a trip to Delanco camp to lead worship for their Camp Meeting. Three of the guys from my praise team and I spent Labor Day week doing what I love to do... Bible study, worship, fellowship, and volleyball. Lots of volleyball. It was an amazing time of renewal for me even though our schedule was a bit hectic with the whole music thing. It couldn't have come at a better time either.
That next week I started classes. Yeah, for the first time in 12 years, I had a first day of school. The Lord has been pretty clear with me for a few years now that I am to get my masters in counseling. I have been wrestling with whether to combine that with an Mdiv (Masters of Divinity) or not. At this point I don't necessarily desire to be ordained, although the counsel of those around me is to just get it anyway. I'm still praying on that. My bachelor's degree is not in psychology, therefore I have to complete 2 or 3 more undergrad-level pysch courses before I can start a masters in counseling. So on September 5th, classes began. I'm taking 2 classes right now. Even classes at a community college are not cheap and I'm still paying on my undergrad degree at this point, so the thought of incurring more debt has always held me back. I finally decided that if I wait until I have the cash to pay for a master's degree, I'll never do it. God is able and I just need to trust that.
Being in the classroom as a student again is so foreign to me. I've never loved school, but I've always been pretty good at it. My standards for myself are extremely high right now... which is good, but it's definitely a change from my standards in the past. I've found myself exhausted (mentally, physically, emotionally) more times in the past month than I care to admit. I know this is important and I was tired of my own excuses and holding myself back from moving forward, so I just did it. I have to do this. I have to get through this (school) to get to whatever is next. I don't know in what capacity Jesus wants me to use my degree, but I'm excited to see what He has planned. My job right now is to be obedient to what's He's calling me to for today.
Aside from classes, I'm still working full time and subbing two days a week this school year. I love being around the students and I love teaching (though subs aren't often given the opportunity to actually teach), plus I feel like being in the school is an important part of my ministry at the church. Being the beginning of the school year, there hasn't been much opportunity to sub yet, but the couple days that I've been there have been great. I had one youth kid in my class and got to see 3 others just out and about in the hallways. I love how excited they get when they see me.
Youth group has been going really well so far this year. My junior high program has grown quite a bit... mainly because 2 of my favorite 6th graders are a part of the program now. Their presence has made a very positive impact and I'm really excited to see what Jesus is going to do this year. Something else that has been great with the junior high ministry is the consistent presence of other adults. It's been great to watch relationships start to form between the students and the volunteers. One of the volunteers is a recent high school graduate who's staying local for school and I know the junior high kids love having someone closer to their age to relate to. It's so important for them to see and be around someone who has been through a youth ministry program lately. Between that volunteer and the other parent, I finally feel like I'm not doing this alone. They are very willing to invest in the kids which is great. This past week, Allan taught the lesson which was fantastic and it gave me a chance to sit back and observe the kids and just be with them. My curriculum for both junior and senior high is completely focused on Jesus... on His life, His ministry, and on how to walk with Him daily and why it's important to do so. Senior high continues to have low numbers, but I'm grateful that I get to do closer discipling with the students. God knows each of our/their needs and I'm trusting Him with youth group.
The young adult group that I lead is studying Experiencing God. I did the youth version of the study when I was in high school and it had a huge impact on my walk with Christ. When I suggested that this group do Experiencing God, they were a bit reluctant because of the amount of work and time commitment, but I can see the benefits of it already. A lot of it is coming back to me, but I'm also gaining so much from it. Thanks be to God for placing that on my heart for this group. The group has grown a bit and there are now 8 of us, which is the perfect size for such an in-depth study. I've spent a good amount of time in prayer for this group and for them to be impacted and challenged in a huge way. God is ready for some major commitment from some of these people and I can't wait to see how He chooses to use them. Praise the Lord for resources and studies like Experiencing God that really push us.
Something else that is HUGE is that we are starting a Saturday service at church. Our "contemporary" service currently meets at 8:30am on Sundays. Realistically, that's just not the time of day those who are looking for truly contemporary worship will come out to church. The new service is called Yield and it will meet at 4:30pm on Saturday afternoons starting on October 19th. My senior pastor, Tom, and I have been discussing and praying about this for over a year now. With the Lord's leading we're moving forward. The service will be primarily led by me and Allan. (He has just stepped up into a larger leadership role here at the church and it's so encouraging to see God working so clearly through him. Yay!) This means that I will be preaching nearly every week, especially at the beginning as Pastor Tom will be out with a knee replacement. I have to say, 16 months ago when I accepted this job I had no idea that I'd be leading a worship service and preaching, but God's plans are so much bigger and greater (um, duh!). Personally, what strikes me most about this new service (right now) is that it has never once felt like an added "burden." My nerves aren't going nuts with the thought of the responsibility of it all or of my inadequacies and I can only attribute this to the Holy Spirit. With His leading, it's all about God and not about me or my abilities/inabilities. The glory is His. It's only about furthering His Kingdom. Would you join us in praying for this new ministry? Pray for unity. Pray for those who will be attending. Pray for us as we continue to organize and prepare. Pray, pray, pray! Prayer is way too underutilized these days, but it's the most important part of this.
Yet another thing I'm really excited about is a meeting of local youth pastors. A week and a half ago I met with a group of 3 men regarding See You At the Pole (which is tomorrow morning, prayer very welcome) planning. 2 of the guys happened to be youth pastors for local churches. The 3 of us discussed the desires we each had to meet and connect to encourage each other in our ministries and pray. This coming Monday we will have the first meeting and there will be about 7 of us in total, including my bff, Stacy. I will be hosting the first meeting at my church and we'll rotate from there. Our goal is to meet on the first Monday of every month. Just meeting with the 2 guys last week was an encouragement so I can't wait for all of us to get together. Praise Jesus for knowing just what we need!
On a completely unrelated topic, it's been hard to be away from Chicago these days. I miss my family a lot. I miss going upstairs, plopping down in a chair next to my mom, and just verbally processing my day. I miss seeing my nieces grow up and figure out life. Kayla will be 9 in about a month and a half... how is that even possible? They are both at such cool ages... learning and taking in the world around them. I wish that I could be consistent influence in their lives. I want them to know Jesus so bad. The rest of my family too, for that matter. My dad's health is ever declining and it makes me physically ill to think about it. It seems like the downward slope's gradient has increased and it's moving way too fast for me. Please pray for him and for my mom, of course... I worry about my mom's health too. They are amazing. My sister and bro-in-law got married on a beach in Florida a couple of weeks ago. It was just them and their girls. I wish I could have gone. My brother is much the same, it seems. Stagnant, I'd say. It makes me sad. I think he's been made for greater things. There's a lot of potential there. (Help him, Jesus. Help him see a need for You.) At the end of the day when I go home, I'm going home by myself. My heart has really been struggling with this lately. No pity-party, just the reality of my current situation. Jesus knows the desires of my heart, so I'll keep praying for my future husband and our kids.
I have so many other thoughts circulating and just bursting to get out, but I've got laundry to fold, animals to feed (I got a cat, btw. His name is Paka and his sole purpose is to kill crickets. He's doing his job very well so far), dinner to cook, a workout to complete, classes to study for, and Bible study to lead tonight. It's no wonder I haven't taken the time to update... I've not had it. I'm not complaining, I'm extremely grateful to God for the craziness of life right now.
