In the Prayer Room...

Last Wednesday I cancelled worship team practice because most of the kids weren't able to come, but I still managed to get to WSUMC an hour early for the Thanksgiving Eve service. So instead of hanging out with whoever I could find around the church I decided to wander into the prayer room.
With big comfy couches and chairs, a kiddie table for drawing/coloring, and other seats sporadically placed throughout the room, I found myself sitting on the floor at the foot of the cross. This solemn yet victorious symbol of the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior stood very tall and powerful before me. I sat in silence for a while and allowed my mind to roll over all of the people and situations that I could remember to bring before the Lord. At the foot of the cross I didn't feel the need to be vocal. I love silent communication with God sometimes. Other times I get in my car, buckle my seatbelt, the passenger seatbelt, and have not-so-silent conversations with God. In any case Jesus knows my worries before I think them, before I speak them, before I even realize them. That's been a huge comfort to me over the past week...
Most people who know me well know that I'm NOT a very emotional person in the sense that I don't cry. I don't like drama and I don't like being dramatic about things (though being a girl sometimes takes over and I fail at that). This isn't to say that I'm unfeeling and cold or anything because I'd like to think that I'm pretty warm and loving. All that to say that I have this tendency to internalize things meaning that I try to deal with stuff on my own, in my own head and heart. (Although of course I have awesome friends I can count on to let me vent sometimes.)
So because of this, I go through seasons of trials. I let stuff build and build and build within my heart and mind and then it becomes too much and I concave in on myself. So I've decided to work on being better at bringing stuff to the foot of the cross. One of the main things I learned from being away last year was that I needed to be COMPLETELY dependent on God, trusting in Him, casting my cares on Him. It's so easy with cell phones and the internet to turn to people more often than I turn to God. It's so easy and tangible to call my BFF when I need to vent or even laugh. Shouldn't it be so much easier to turn to God first though?? I mean the lines of communication NEVER fail. You don't lose service, the website never fails to load, and the battery doesn't die. The line to God is always on and ready to be utilized. There's so much comfort in that and resting before the cross was a reminder of how open that line of communication is. Internalizing things may not always be the best thing and seeking the counsel of Godly women (and men) is a great idea, but the best idea is to come to the foot of the cross.
Then, today after church I found myself back in that same prayer room... really looking forward to hanging out with Jesus. This time I chose to sit in the big, comfy leather chair and kick my feet up on the ottoman. Saturday had been a very challenging day in a couple different ways and I wanted to go over some stuff with the Big Guy. Sunday mornings aren't real conducive to alone time in the prayer room considering that people are signed up to be in there to pray with you if you want. It just so happened that there was a guy in there that was a few years younger than me when we were in the youth group, so we got to chatting and before I knew it I only had a short time to spend in the Word and in prayer before my meeting. At first I was disappointed, not because I didn't enjoy the conversation with an old buddy, but because I had wanted this to be MY time to just sit alone with God. However in the little time that I did have by myself Jesus hinted to me the importance of really seeking out other Godly men and women to help you steer through life. Jesus had a group that he really depended on, but He depended completely on His Father. It's so awesome to have the friends that I have, I mean I'm truly blessed... like beyond belief. I love having people in all walks of life to turn to for counsel and advice. Today I felt like God was really encouraging me to seek out a mentor and someone I can look to for unbiased, outside advice. Someone who I love and trust, but not someone in my immediate group of friends. These kind of relationships are SO important to have!! I have a meeting this Wednesday with a woman I really admire and I simply cannot wait to see how God uses our relationship and interactions to advise me in my other relationships and such. How wise is the advice of older peeps? I'm looking forward to someone who will really challenge me to walk nearer to the Lord, will challenge me in my relationships to make sure they are Godly, and will challenge me to be a Godly woman, supportive and loving.
I totally encourage you to do the same. This isn't just girly stuff though. Guys... find a guy, or a few guys to challenge you, to teach you how to be a man of the Lord and a leader. Ask them how to "man-up" and seek their advice in your ministry and work, in your friendships, in your relationships. Seek to be the kind of men God wants you to be. It's biblical and it's important!
On a totally different note... my birfday is in ONE month and a day!! Chamuka (get excited)!!! I'm gonna be 27ish... at least I'm not 28ish... ;) Also, I'm really excited because I've recently starting writing some songs again and it's been really therapeutic. I can't believe I've waited this long to get back into it, but I'm loving it!