Real Danger

"Gunshots in the night. Bombs rocking the earth. Running for your life. Where's my family? Did they survive? Will I? War. Endless war. All I've ever known since I was a child is war.

It's just a way of life now. The choice to join the fight was easy... if that kind of choice is ever easy for a child of 13. Fighting for freedom, fighting for rights. Fighting to see an end to the oppression of thousands, if not millions of my people. Fighting so that when I have kids they can be free, educated, and maybe even well off. Fighting so that life can improve. Fighting so that we can simply stay alive and see another sunrise over the African savannah. Fighting because there doesn't seem to be any other choice.

The worst of our danger used to be the lions, hyenas, crocs, hippos, and snakes. Now the danger comes from our fellow man. Guns are heavy when you're 13, but I would never have admitted that at the time. We trained, learned tactics, and became machines. Machines with one function. We were trained not to stare into our enemies eyes and just to fire. Seeing the eyes makes it worse. I don't know the number of people who fell to my bullets, I don't want to know. We were trained that the lives of our enemies were worthless. I learned to shoot a gun before I ever learned how to ride a bike, before I learned much at all about the world. My education stopped when I joined the army. What's the use in finishing school if you're dead before you graduate? I made it through 3rd grade before the war came close to home.

I'm now 27 and in my junior year of high school. I'm a former child soldier; a man now in the eyes of the world, but I was a man long before most."

So I wrote this tonight because of a dream/nightmare I had early this morning. It was so real, I was there. It's been in my mind all day and I just can't ignore it anymore. You are all aware that I'm friends with some former child soldiers from Sudan. These guys are my brothers and I love them very much. This isn't any one of their very different, very specific stories. This is a combination of what I've been told by them and many others like them. The thought of writing a book has run through my mind many times, but I don't actually want to gain from the horrific knowledge and pictures that fill my brain. I simply want to raise awareness.

You guys, there is fighting in the Blue Nile region in (North) Sudan. I know I mentioned this in my last post, but as I chatted with one of the guys recently the situation reached a new level in my mind. Their families have fled. One doesn't know where his father is, the probability of his life being over is very high. The guys are stressed and upset and how could they not be? One of them seriously mentioned going home to help his family... leaving school and entering a war zone. This isn't just any war zone, it's a place where they are being hunted for their affiliation with the "rebel" army of the South. Those affiliated with the South are being captured, tortured, and killed.

When he told me he wanted to go home my heart started pounding as if it were trying to escape from my chest. Knowing that my student from the Centre and one of their fathers has already been captured does not leave me much hope that the same won't happen to him too. I started to feel nauseous at the thought of loosing a brother. In all honesty I panicked a bit. There's no doubt in my mind that if he goes home right now, he'll be killed. Sitting here in Uganda, not knowing if he was safe or not would drive me crazy. For him, not going home is betraying his family. With the possibility of his father being dead, he's now the oldest male in the household and is expected to take care of the family. The family that he's not lived with since he was a child, the family he's not seen lately. He feels obligated to drop his education and go. He knows the risk, but denies it.

The war in Sudan and South Sudan is not over. Fighting continues, lives are being lost, and people are once again fleeing their homes. It's too real. The second that one of them mentioned going home was the second that my world view changed. I wasn't content with their past, but the chance of their future being a reflection of their past is not ok. History repeating is not ok.

Please join me in falling to your knees for Sudan and South Sudan. Lift up these two nations, and all war torn nations to the Lord. People that you don't know and probably never would have come in contact with are dying. Guys and families that I love are in danger. Very real danger. The greatest danger though, is that they don't know Jesus. Plead for their souls with me. Pray for truth to be revealed and for hearts to be softened to the Word. Pray for them to see visions... many Muslims have come to Christ through visions. Pray. They have heard the truth about Jesus... pray for acceptance. Pray for peace in those nations, pray for peace in their hearts as they're "stuck" in school. Pray. Pray for safety. Pray. Please.