I'd known since June that I would be preaching this past Sunday. I knew what scriptures I was going to use and what I was going to talk about. It seemed very appropriate to speak about David handing the kingdom of Israel over to Solomon. I read and reread the scriptures in Kings and Chronicles... I knew them pretty well. It was important for me to feel very comfortable with the scripture because I don't use notes when I speak. Notes have a tendency to slow me down and confuse me by making me lose my train of thought. I know what I'm going to talk about and I just do it.
Nerves have never been much of an issue for me either. Speaking in front of people doesn't intimidate me and I actually enjoy it. Being so busy with family in town didn't leave much time to worry anyways.
Thursday came and my family understood that it was my day to really sit down and focus on the sermon. When I got to my office at the church (which is in the youth room) it was in the midst of being turned into a campsite. This week is VBS, therefore last week the church was being set up for the theme of the week. The women who were working in my room were very respectful and did their best to stay quiet. However with many different people in and out, asking questions, and chatting, what should have taken about 2 hours took all day. It's no one's fault but my own that I planned on working on Thursday. I could have done it last week or over the weekend before my family came, but that's just not how I work. If I'm going to do well I've got to sit down just a couple of days before so it stays very fresh in my mind... and then I continue to read and reread the scriptures in those couple of days. That's just what works for me. Often times I don't have a lesson plan for youth group set until the day before. It just works for me.
That being said, I finally finished my sermon around 5:00pm on Thursday. I took advantage of the empty church and went into the sanctuary to practice and time the sermon. It went fairly well, but was a bit longer than I wanted. I knew there were some things I could cut out, so I went home with it running through my head. I spent Friday and Saturday with my family, though we just hung out locally on Saturday because I was wanting to go over to the church to practice again. There were people at the church until about 7pm, setting up for VBS, so I didn't get to practice again until they were gone. I ran through it again and shortened it successfully, but something didn't feel right. I was comfortable with the scripture, but I felt like God was leading me to change the topic of the sermon a bit... 12 hours before I was to give it.
Thus, my nerves kicked in and I began to realize the weight of the next day. Preaching for the first time in a new church is intimidating!! Not many people in the congregation know me beyond a few Sunday mornings of helping with small parts of worship... knowing that fact made me believe that their expectations would be very high. There were even certain individuals that came to mind that made me nervous... especially since I wasn't completely sure where God was leading me.
I sat and I prayed. I waited and listened. God gave me a new scripture to use along with the ones I was already using. It fit in perfectly (of course!). So at 8:30pm I went home, hung out with the family, and went to bed. I woke up frequently, but prayed myself back to sleep each time. The Holy Spirit kept bringing peace, against what I imagine was a bit of an attack of the evil one. I awoke too early, but decided to get up, pray, and get ready early. I was able to go over to the church and spend time in prayer, read through my scriptures and the notes I made the day before. I was nervous prior to walking up to the alter, but once the microphone was in hand and I prayed with the congregation, I was good to go. My prayer for so long had been that the words I was speaking would not be my own... that God would speak louder than me. It flowed and the added scripture was more than relevant. Glory to God because it was nothing I did. I just tried to listen. The truth of Jesus speaks for itself!
Thanks to all who prayed and lifted me up as I prepared and as I spoke. I appreciate your support!
Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age." -Matthew 28:19-20
No comments:
Post a Comment