"E"

As I pull into the orphanage I'm greeted by sounds of loud, raucous laughter and even some tears from the infants.  The house that the orphanage is in is fairly big, but I can see that the need is growing.  It seems like every week there's a new baby.  I don't just mean 6 month old, I'm talking days old.  These tiny, precious lives are just thrown away.  I don't understand.

I walk around to the back door, take my shoes off, and head inside.  The first task is hand washing.  It's so important for the health of the babies that volunteers come in clean.  After washing my hands I head to the infant room to see if I can find my little buddy.

Meet "E"

This is "E".  He's incredibly precious!  The first time I visited Loving Hearts Babies Home was back in May.  E had just arrived to the home then and was very, very tiny and very malnourished.  That first day, I fell in love with him.  He had these big beautiful eyes that just shined so brightly.  He was only a week or 2 old at the time.  He's now about 5 months.  As you can see, he's still really small for a 5 month old, but he's doing much better health-wise.

Now every week when I go to Loving Hearts, E is the first one I greet.  I should feel guilty about ignoring the others... there are SO many of them, but I don't.  E is my special buddy.  From the moment I get him out of his crib to change him and play with him, he's smiling.  When the "aunties" who work there hand him off to me, he smiles.  He's not the easiest little guy to make smile, but for me, he smiles brightly.

I didn't realize until yesterday just how attached I had become.  I was there with a couple of other missionaries, who I usually go with.  I handed E off to Austin, one of the missionary kids so that I could scoot one of the other babies up in their bouncer.  Austin was sitting with E playing happily and I decided to pick up another sweet little girl who I've been playing with since she was a week old too.  We played for a few minutes then I was walking around the room with her... handing toys to the others who were just sitting there playing alone.  

The room was loud and bustling with movement of the toddlers, but apparently I got close enough to E that he heard my voice.  He stopped what he was doing and started to get a little fussy for Austin.  Austin said, "he was fine until he heard you!"  So I backed away so that Austin could keep playing with him, but after maybe 10 minutes he began to fuss again.  I went over and traded babies with him.  As soon as E was in my arms he was calm and even a little smiley again.  

Now with my nieces when they were little it was similar unless their parents were around... especially Kayla.  So I definitely understand that it's common for babies to learn your smell and voice, and to become attached.  But this feels different.  I only see him once a week or so.  Even the "aunties" have commented on his behavior with me.  It's amazing.  Just out of curiosity I asked about his status... if he was already in the process of being adopted or not.  I really want to see him go to a really good home.  He's so sweet and he's really affectionate.  

The woman in the office who I asked about it asked me if I was wanting to adopt him.  My immediate response was, "no, I'm single and I don't want children until I'm married."  As I walked away, got in my car and drove away I couldn't stop thinking about E.  Let me be clear in saying that there's no way I can adopt him right now.  First of all, I don't want kids right now.  Second, being single really does make a difference.  Third, E has an older sister and they're a "package deal".  However, I can't help but want to love in this sweet little life as much as possible before I go... especially because he loves me so much.  :)

Life in an orphanage is better than no life, but it's far from great.  There are just not enough people willing to love on all of the kids that are in all of the orphanages around the world.  Loving Hearts is just one place with 25 or so kids.  Think of the thousands of places around the world.  While I was there yesterday a new baby girl was brought in.  We guessed that she's around 4 months old.  She is pretty chubby which means she wasn't neglected, but one day someone decided they didn't want her anymore, dropped her at the police post and left.  HOW??  Why?  As I looked into her sweet, confused eyes I couldn't help but tear up.  How could someone just leave such a sweet girl?  How could someone just toss E away like he's nothing?  How could all of these kids sit in an orphanage starved for love for weeks, months, and years?  

I can't imagine tossing a kid away, but so many of the cases here are just that.  Irresponsible people unable to deal with the consequences of their actions.  A new generation being tossed away.  A new generation with aids.  Precious lives given up.  How many die in the street when they're left?  How many never make it to an orphanage?  Praise the Lord for places like Loving Hearts who give kids a chance.

This isn't my first experience with an orphanage, but it sure is the first time that I've built a such a relationship with a child.  

I'm going to step down off of my soapbox now... Jesus come!  Pray for babies like E to be adopted into loving, Christ-centered families.  Pray for their lives and emotions as they grow.  Pray that the Lord would touch their lives in a special way and bring comfort and joy where it's needed.  Come Lord Jesus, come!