This past week I spent quite a bit of time shopping and preparing for our youth group Ugly Sweater Christmas party. Being a woman, you'd think I'd really enjoy that kind of thing, but hosting parties is not my forte. I always end up anxious about having enough food, enough activities, and also about people actually showing up. I did my best to advertise, invite, and make it sound super fun, but you just never know. And really, I like to spend my time at parties socializing, not running around.
My day Tuesday was spent decorating the youth room, with the help of a friend... and was broken up by a lovely lunch date with Amy Edwards (look, Amy I used your name this time!! You're famous!) and her handsome 11ish-month-old companion, Mason. We went to a local diner with so-so food and not so good atmosphere, but the company balanced out the circumstances.
By the time Saturday came, I was really ready for the party to come and go. It was my last big thing before Christmas for the year. All the food was bought and/or ordered, room was decorated, ugly sweater ready to go, white elephant gifts were wrapped, all that was left was the execution of it all. I went to bed pretty early, knowing that Sunday would be nuts. I got plenty of sleep and awoke feeling very refreshed. Worship was refreshing too, which was nice. It wasn't perfect by any means, but it was very easy to be focused on Jesus. Distractions seemed to vanish as I sang and it was just me and the Lord. The sermon was really good too... a different view of Joseph and a call to all fathers to step up whether biological or not. Sunday school was a nice break. We didn't move forward in Revelation, instead talked about something topical. It's always such a good time with that group though. Those guys always have me laughing.
Even though it was terrible, I watched the Bears game and played with my puppy and relaxed for a bit in the afternoon. Then I came over to the church and started getting last minute stuff set up. People started showing up and the party got underway. The only major hitch was that Olive Garden forgot to send the big salads that I ordered. One of the parents had gone to pick the food up for me and didn't know just how much of everything I had ordered. Oops! I called the OG, asked for a manager, and let them have it. Ok, so I wasn't super mean, but I was very annoyed. Graciously my senior pastor and his wife volunteered to go back and get the salads and extra breadsticks. I got a $40 gift card out of it, so if you want a date to Olive Garden, I'm your girl! ;) The party was a blast. We had plenty of food, the hot chocolate bar was a success, the white elephant exchange was so fun, and there were plenty of super ugly sweaters. The kids had so much fun and I think the adults did too. The adults were all very helpful which allowed me to spend my time with the kids. What a blessing.
When I got up yesterday I was a little bummed that it was all over. It's like how the day after Christmas (and sometimes even the afternoon/evening on Christmas day) is such a downer. So much build up and then it's over. After I fed the dog and let her out, we were playing on the floor when I noticed a big green bubble on her lower tummy. Further inspection revealed a tick. I'm sure you're all aware of my ridiculous, yet very real fear of bugs by now, so you must know that I couldn't handle it on my own. I made a vet appointment for today because she had already eaten (and is a projectile car passenger). I then decided that I just couldn't live with a bug near me all day. I texted a friend and got him to come to remove it, but by the time he came after work, the tick was gone. So I'm hoping it came off outside, but if not than it's somewhere in my house waiting to eat my face off. Gross.
Onto the whole point of this post...
This morning I woke up at 5:30 to go help a friend put his kids on the bus so he could get to work. From the moment I woke up, I felt God beckoning me into Himself, drawing me towards Him. He is a jealous God who wants all of me. So I showered, got ready, and went to my friend's place. When I got there, something was missing. I had spent my drive over focused on finding a fun song to sing on the radio instead of responding to God by taking those 10 short minutes to be with Him. I went in, chatted for a few before he left for work, helped the kids finish getting ready, and put them on the bus... all the while, feeling distracted and unsettled.
I got home, took care of the dog, talked to a friend on the phone, and then came to work. On my 30 second walk to the church, I heard God telling me to be quiet, just to be still. So I greeted our amazing secretary and then grabbed my Bible and headed upstairs to my Sunday school room. No one is ever in that part of the church during the day. I knew I would be uninterrupted. I had just started reading bits and pieces of Hebrews, so I decided to start over and ended up reading the first 6 chapters. Hebrews is one of those books that I'm prone to skip over because I feel like there are other places I'd rather be. Man, was I floored by how clearly God spoke to me through Hebrews today? The life, death, and sovereignty of Jesus were screaming at me as I read. Chapter 4 really captured my heart today. I've spent a lot of my life "on the go," so to speak. This isn't to say that I don't rest and take my Sabbath, but it struck me, just how much I do indeed busy myself. I don't like to be still. I don't like to feel bored and restless. As I read Hebrews, I heard God telling me to just be still. To just let Him be I AM.
"For the word of God is full of living power. It is sharper than the sharpest knife, cutting deep into our innermost thoughts and desires. It exposes us for what we really are. Nothing in all creation can hide from Him. Everything is naked and exposed before his eyes. This is the God to whom we must explain all that we have done.
That is why we have a great High Priest who has gone to heaven, Jesus the Son of God. Let us cling to him and never stop trusting him. This High Priest of ours understands our weaknesses, for he faced all of the same temptations we do, yet he did not sin. So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There we will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it." Hebrews 4:12-16 (NLT)
I then spent time in prayer for a while before actually quieting myself. Sitting in silence, being still in the presence of the King. No pressure, no distractions... just me and Jesus. It was so restful that (even though I can never nap when I want to) I fell sleep for about 20 minutes. When I woke up, I felt completely settled and refreshed.
I want to be still. The song I posted below is by Selah. I love it. Enjoy.
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